she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
His hands were made for my vagina.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize
