Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
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