its not stalking. its research.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
