the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
