I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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