how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
