8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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