OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
