why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
