He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
