I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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