How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
