I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
