for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
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