Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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