awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
