No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
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