Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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