I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
