so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
NoShamevember. You game?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
i think my cat just said my name.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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