This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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