S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Randomize