I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I could fuck to npr.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
