I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Randomize
