i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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