Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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