But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
People in love make me want to vomit
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
