I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
