You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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