Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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