I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
