Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
