Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
