Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
