Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
