She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
