I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize