Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
