I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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