Don't you send me to vm
if i can run in heels then i can drive
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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