Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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