There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
He is an equal opportunity slut.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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