: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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