babies were throwing up all over the place
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
