I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
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