i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
