This girl is more easily done than said...
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
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