Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
