Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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