I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
