Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
