you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
